Monty Python’s Gangs of Keep Left Bollards !

Chatburn Parish Council are currently in conflict with Lancashire County Council Environment Directorate over the removal of the Keep Left Bollards at the bottom of Downham Road, which are causing problems for delivery lorries and buses.

I witnessed the problem first hand the other day when a full length articulated lorry came down from Downham wishing to turn right onto Sawley Road. The driver had no option but to use the wrong side of the said bollards, similarly buses heading up Downham Road often have to use the wrong side if any cars are parked opposite the junction. The aforementioned bollards have been clobbered on numerous occasions over the past year by drivers of long vehicles complying with the Highway Code and therefore risking a charge of Driving Without Due Care and Attention.

I’m certain that Chatburn Parish Council do not wish to criminalise HGV and bus drivers providing essential transport to local business in the communities of surrounding villages in general. However, LCC refuse to remove the said bollards on the grounds that they are a Pedestrian Refuge, despite the fact that people never cross the road there using them. To do so you would have to start from the grass verge outside Hudson’s Ice Cream shop, landing on a house drive at the other side, an altogether pointless exercise. At the current moment in time both the said bollards remain erect if half mangled making one of our main village tourist attractions unsightly.

Obviously LCC have no money to undertake a proper repair and this may be explained by the fact that they waste millions on EU inspired Political Correctness. A few years ago Downham Road was resurfaced with alleged Quiet Tarmac, I was amazed when when I saw that one of the four wheelers delivering it was from Wrexham. The haulage from North Wales must have cost a fortune when there is a coating plant just two miles down the road which could have used Blue Grit-stone brought in from North Craven.

The benefits of Quiet Tarmac are dubious now that almost everyone has double glazing, furthermore, it presents a hazard to those hard of hearing. Perhaps LCC Environment Directorate officers are attempting to promote False Economic Growth on the Stock Market by encouraging the sale of hearing aids, in order to swell the value of any Share ISA they may hold ?

Perhaps if LCC finances got really desperate they could always weigh in all the aluminium signs associated with 20 MPH zones for scrap, like we lost our iron railings to help in WW2. It would appear that our elected politicians have been badly advised over recent years, and perhaps its high time for a Stalinist Purge of County Hall !

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2 thoughts on “Monty Python’s Gangs of Keep Left Bollards !

  1. I got this published in the Clitheroe Advertiser & Times as a letter under the heading How Green is Your Valley !

    I can’t help speculating how many Ribble Valley residents will consider the cost of implementing EU environment directives, as Gold Plated by DEFRA when deciding whether to ” Vote Leave ” or ” Remain ” in June. Ever since the 1990s Lancashire County Council has been keen to co-opt the latest EU inspired ” Safety ” and ” Green ” ideology, starting with Traffic Calming.

    Clitheroe Town Centre is now reminicent of a Third World country, and perhaps the roads would have been in better condition if they had never been touched since the 1970s. It couldn’t possibly have had anything to do with the fact that one of the key politicians responsible for the current situation was subsequently convicted for major Benefit Fraud ?

    It doesn’t end there, the EU Renewable Energy directive forces everyone to buy 5% ( soon to be 10% ) mostly Orangutan murdering Palm Oil in their essential Diesel. The same principle applies to Monsanto Genetically Modified Corn Ethanol in Petrol, which likewise into the bargain gives you less Mpg than pure refined mineral oil.

    LCC’s wood biomass heating for schools policy probably threatens the tropical rain-forests as it makes chipboard more expensive compared to plywood. It is probably also significantly inflating the price of everyday essentials like Bog Roll !

    The £20 Million cost of LCC extracting itself from the Rip-Off £2 Billion PFI contract for their Green vanity project Waste Composting plants at Farrington and near Fleetwood now means our village libraries may have to close. Its said that even our main library at Clitheroe is under threat, thus forcing those often working part time on low incomes to fork out a ” Private Tax ” for an internet Mobile Phone contract in order to claim their Universal Credit. Furthermore, if Clitheroe Library closes the Ribble Valley disabled will have nowhere convenient to go to renew their Ministry of Silly Walks ” Blue Badge “.

    Of course LCC could have built medium scale Waste Incinerators to avoid Landfill Tax like the Isle of Man which gets 10% of its electricity base-load from such. However, here on the mainland there would have been major objections from EU funded Green NGO’s like Greenpeace etc. Long ago now I did actually campaign for a Ribble Valley incinerator at Barrow Lodges in a letter in the CA&T, and wrote on the subject to our MP Nigel Evans. As usual my argument fell of deaf ears, yet it was my idea to move the Tourist Information Centre into the Platform Gallery to save RVBC money, even if it happened some time after for people to forget !

    If only Green Pinocchio’s nose had been cut for timber, then perhaps we could have built ” Jerusalem ” in England’s green and pleasant land, not the virtual ” West Bank ” separation in a nation divided by financial apartheid we would appear to be heading for if current UK government policy is not changed entirely.

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